Nature vs. Nuture

I was presented with a question about myself during my 10th year anniversary dinner with my husband Pat. We were talking about the having children and our plans for it. He had mentioned that he didn't seem as the nurturing kind and I immediately agreed with him assuming I knew what he was talking about.

Since then, I have been thinking about this comment. What does nurturing mean? What does it mean to nurture a child? I have interviewed hundreds of women who have chosen to have children but my questions where always centered around their decision to have children. I never thought to ask the question on what do they think it takes to raise a well adjusted child.

So, I asked Jeeves. He pulled up a seminar on raising children in a nurturing environment. In the brochure it describes nurturing parenting as "a philosophy that emphasizes the importance of raising children in a warm, trusting, and emphatic household. To nurture is to promote the growth and development while showing respect for yourself, others, and the environment."

Well, I can do that. I can raise a child in a warm, trusting and emphatic household. Isn't that what I do with Ivan, my dog? Well, it's a lot different, but hey, it's all I have to go by.

Weeks later, I realized that I can give a child a good life. A life where he/she will feel loved, be happy, and be the best she can be because I will do my best to encourage the child to do his/her best, I will be supportive and be there for her the best I can. Nurturing or not, that's what I have.

So, I may not be naturally nurturing, but I think I can do this.

Happy 10th Anniversary

Here it is, the 10th year of marriage. Is it all it's hyped up to be? All day I thought about the last 10 years of my life with my husband and all I could think of was how much I look forward to the 10 years to come.

It's amazing how I always envisioned something to be and when you're there you just make it exactly the way you want it to be. For example, today we worked, then I scrambled to get an anniversary present for him (something I end up doing each year), I take Ivan for a walk, and then we go to dinner. We did have tickets to see the Lion King next weekend, so that will be another evening of celebration. But tonite, my ideal way to spend the night was to have an intimate dinner with Pat over nice dinner and wine, relax and talk about things close to our hearts.

Now I'm in the bedroom with Ivan and Pat is watching a bit of TV before going to sleep. For the fly on our wall it would seem like another day to him. For me, it was a fulfilling day. A day filled with fond memories of the past, and plans for the future to come. I will go to sleep with my head full of thoughts of tonite.

It was a great evening, one of the better dinners I've had with Pat in a very long time. I love when we can just talk about anything, share about everything. It's nice to reconnect, laugh and be together.

Happy 10th Anniversary!

Special Olympics made especially for me

I just came back from a weekend of back braking 8-hour drives each way to Boise from CDA, shuttling 5 eager athletes plus the coach. I was one of the volunteers that brought 13 athletes to Boise to compete in the Special Olympics state championships. This is my 3rd year accompanying the team and each time I feel fuller than when I left Coeur d'alene. We get there on a Friday afternoon and rush to dinner and the opening ceremonies. It has been a full day for us since we left CDA at 5:45am. Very tired from the day, we still muster the energy to cheer for the Kootenai County Equestrians when our name is called out. The opening ceremonies are very much like the Olympics, where a torch is lit by an athlete and speakers present their speeches. Then the oath is taken. "Let me win, but if I cannot win, let me be brave in the attempt." An athlete usually leads the crowd in this oath. This oath always brings tears into my eyes because these athletes are much braver than me in so many ways. In a way, I have taken this oath into my personally life. ..."but if I cannot win, let me be brave in the attempt." ....I believe that people just do the best they can in life. I know that they would like to win and be the best and we know that not everyone can be the best. So, just being brave enough to try is good enough. These athletes are a daily inspiration to me. They are the braves people I know.

The team brought home tons of medals of varying colors: Gold, Silver, and bronze. I think our team, although we are the smallest team, had the most spirit. Each time one of our athletes were receiving a medal, the room will shake from the cheering of the team for one of their own, regardless of what place that athlete took. Oh but most of them know the difference...they all want Gold. But the happiness, the support and the cheers stayed at the same intensity. I sometimes remove myself from the situation and try to be an outsider looking in. I look at the faces of the athletes' parents, the coach and the other athletes and I am so glad that I am part of this event.

Let me win, but if I cannot win, let me be brave in the attempt.